Mums trying to give a child a 'new dad'

My ex is possibly pregnant, yet she sends me message saying that if a child is there we will have to have her alternate days.

Now she has a new boyfriend, she is now texting me saying that, the child will have his surname and he will sign the birth certificate.

I can't get my head around mums that think they are the main carer of a child.

if ur the dad she cant put his name on the birth certificated or give it his surnames if she is pregnant ul need to get a dna test to prove your the dad then she cant do any of the things she says she will. you could even fight for custody of the child if u think shes an unfit mother

I don't know about other countries, but being that DNA tests happen after birth. Unless you get an amniocentesis, which could risk the baby's life. Anyway, because it happens after birth, she can have him sign the BC *at least in America* and give the baby his last name if she so chooses to. Poop, she can give the baby any last name she wants to even if the actual father chooses to sign the BC.

He'll probably have to contest paternaty *that he is the father* and most likely pay for a DNA test, and take it to court to see the baby, but it should work in his favor because he is willing to be part of the baby's life.

That's what's going on in my one friend's life right now. Neither he or his ex new bf signed the BC, but the baby only knows him as father, and the other guy as daddy, and the other guy's whole family thinks that he is the father of the baby. It's terrible. One day, that baby will be old enough to rat them all out. Hopefully though, my friend will have it all together to get custody soon.

DNA testing can now be done before birth with absoutely not problems. I heard it on the radio last week.

Hmm... I didn't know that. Cool!!

Do you want the baby?

the birth mother can put any name on the certificate as far as im aware, however you can file for a paternity test if you wish to know for sure.

if you are unsure whether the baby is yours, take the test but only if you are prepared to take a active role in the babys upbringing if proven to be the father.

if no test done,and girl puts other partner down on certificate,surely that excludes you from any financial obligations in the future.

personally i would like to know.

Yeah, that's what I was trying to say, but I said it less poorly than this

had an ex girlfriend who turned up after ten years claiming her daughter was mine, when she bumped into me one day, went home told my wife who was herself pregnant.

she accepted it was a possibility but i insisted on a dna test, my ex would not do it,later found out the true father was an old school friend of mine who had gone into the forces.

so please try to establish the truth before you make any real life changing decisions.

I thought it was illegal to knowingly put someone's name down on the birth certificate as the father when they aren't.

thats what i thought to

At least in America, it's not, as long as both "fathers" don't care. If natural dad doesn't want to be part of the child's life, and isn't going to cause any problems in the future, and the other dad is willing to be the child's father, without question, and going to take on finacial resposibility, then it's fine.

The problem comes in if there is a breakup between the dad who signed, cuz then he may no longer want to be finacially responsable. Or, if there is something life changing for the natural dad, then, there is trouble.

I think it should be illigal for anyone but the two real (biological) parents to be on the BC. If i could i would take the law to court, as the british law gives un married fathers no right over their children, which i think is sick and how can they evn think to make that the law.

Not even rights to see the child for visitation? That is so sad.

Well, if it means that much to you, go to the hospital when the child is being born, and tell them that you may be the father, and you wish for a DNA test. Maybe they won't let the other guy sign the BC til paternity is established. I can't believe that there are no rights, I bet you are just looking in the wrong places. I just now saw that you were 17. Is she also? She's gonna regret doing this later in life if she does.

Good for you though, for stepping up and being a man. At least a guy who wants to be part of his kids life!!

Every father, should have every right, and I think both mother and father shoud have a dna test when registering a child. as there are too many women that think they can choose for a child and even be sick enough, to try and choose its father.