More Funnies

@rondetto Said

I'm just back from the shops there and seen a blonde shouting into an envelope.
I asked her what she was doing and she said she was sending a voice mail.

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Paddy buys a humpty dumpty from aldi.
It's great it comes with aldi Kings horses and aldi Kings men.

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Please don't forget.
Tonight the moon will be visible from earth. The last time this happened was last night.

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Paddy rang the RSPCA and said "I've just found a suitcase with four fox cubs in it.
"That's terrible." The RSPCA officer said. "Are they moving?"
"I'm not sure." says Paddy. "But that would explain why they're in a suitcase."

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I just got 3 tips off a bookie for the Grand National.
Sunshine.
Moonlight.
Good Times.
If they don't win, don't blame it on Sunshine, don't blame it on Moonlight, don't blame it on Good Times, blame it on the Bookie.

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I’m on my way home yesterday from work and I saw this blue Vauxhall going slow in front of me it was for sale it had a number on the back window so me I decided to call it
Me: "Hello im calling about your Vauxhall is it still for sale?"
Them: "Yes."
Me: "Does it run?"
Them: "Yes."
Me : "Well speed up or get the hell out my way."

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