And, there's more

@rondetto Said

News just in….Three cliff walkers have fallen to their deaths! What are the chances of them all having the same name?

___

I was kissing my girlfriend on the sofa the other night and she says to me, "Let's take this upstairs"
I said, "Yeah OK"
"How we gonna do this? You take one end and I'll take the other?"

___

When you find a good wife you not only get a best friend and companion, you also receive a
Driving Instructor for LIFE!

___

I got an old Elvis record down the market, called ‘Wooden Leg’,
I said to the bloke:
“I thought it was ‘wooden heart?”
He said: “well, yes, but this is a pirate copy”

___

I give you words of Ancient Chinese Wisdom. Confucius says crosseyed teachers cannot control their pupils.

___

Man discovers his girlfriend is really a ghost.
"I had my suspicions when she walked through the door..."

___